Karsha☆Forever

The night of the carnival slowly transitioned to dark. Everything was like the site of candy… at the grand opening that is. But it all began to twist into a demented scene of horror. At first you thought it was all fun in games until the carnival gates closed, When you finally realized what was going on and you were locked inside its gates. But it is now to late and I can hear the screams as it all came down to an end. Everything became pitch black as I myself had always seen it.

Meaning: the person viewing this carnival (the carnival being the stuff in the world that is pleasing to the eye.) has always know it was evil from the start even though it was pleasing to the eyes in the beginning. But it took the person to find out all the pleasures of the carnival fades away into the night and leaves you trapped in a place you dont want to be. The viewer of this carnival tried to warn you but you did not listen.

A poem I made in about 5 minutes.

Shadows:

The shadows drape across my room
I feel so stuffed up in this tomb
all the lights ever do is flicker
stamped upon their head is a sticker
reading”I am alive but dead”
in capital letters of bloody red
but only a few can see what I see
but sometimes I feel like its only me.
an insite of frustration
and so much desperation
where do you find breath in life
when many cut their spirits with a knife
spiritual suicide
or is it really a homicide?
and if it is its such a crime
when will the clock be out of time.
for those who have done and not felt sorry
their victim are novas in the sky
for the chosen few who are hidden like spies
we see them like a broken display
There is no need for an event replay
because you know what, it happens every single day.

Yep I make a lot of these XD

Towers:

And all these towers
are swaying like flowers
such destruction and despair
but does anybody really care
in the wind they blow to break
but no one hears the sounds it makes
will anyone open their eyes and wake
cracking and toppling into bits
but no one seems to want to admit
the truth and destruction that faces us all
that breaks us down and all these walls
watching it all crumble, a tear drops
when will it stop
when will it end
Oh please can it be mend?

Another poem I wrote while drawing… in fact it was on one of my speed paints :p I forgot I was recording.

At all Sides:

The robots are coming
marching like zombies
when I do not teader
they are dictated by their leader
here they come!
Oh I’m not numb
I feel ever bruise
and they seem to come in twos
one for each side
while  time is ticking by
coming for me to loose
I just have a couple more minutes left
but here they come
Far to close
Am I going to win
they make me question

Never finished this:

Earth Song

Is this what you want to see?
Landfills cluttered to the tee
Is this what you want to be?
Living your life in luxury
Money is your only gain
but what is left that will remain
you dont even seem to care
but maybe you will when you get up there
when all thats left in the air
is the O-zone layer ripped and teared
and all the rain forest’s are still and bare
will you listen to the voice by then?
or are you to blind by the money in your hand?
cant you see your destroying all the soil and the land?


getting wrapped in the thorns of politics
while your mind decays and is getting sick.

A spare in the moment type of poem/lyrics.

Catastrophy

What is this all suppose to mean

it feels like it is wounding me

in all of this what is to see?

When test and trials are surrounding me.

Im getting stuck in green gooped slime.

when will the bells begin to chime?

Flowing through this old sublime.

Or will I be out of all my time

What a catastrophe

If you give up!

Pouring your life in a paper cup

Thats not much!

What a catastrophe

if your not right

not trying with all your might

just flying high on your kite

What a catastrophe

not wanting to admit you’ve sinned

just give it time you say

the stars will make them self

what a catastrophe

when you choose not to believe

you don’t want to get down on your knees

but that is your missing key!

What a catastrophe

when you wont admit the truth.

You don’t want to think about it

you think you’ve got your wits

but just think about it

what you confess

we’re playing a life of chess

will you win or lose?

Who’s side will you choose?

Or do you just refuse

are you all confused

feeling so abused

blaming God for it all

causing you to fall

the devils out there too

blinding you by his lies

making you think your wise

but just open your eyes!

Then you will see

what its all about

What a catastrophe

If you give up!

Pouring your life in a paper cup

Thats not much!

What a catastrophe

if your not right

not trying with all your might

just flying high on your kite

What a catastrophe

not wanting to admit you’ve sinned

just give it time you say

the stars will make them self

what a catastrophe

when you choose not to believe

you don’t want to get down on your knees

but that is your missing key!

What a catastrophe

when you wont admit the truth.

Just thought I would post some of the lyrics I made a year or so ago.. maybe even 2 years ago. Ill be posted a couple more.

It’s Time

these teardrops on my jeans
to the cuts on my arms
the pain that I feel grows deep into harm
eating me in
and eating me out
its not the outside that its about
its a fight within
thats growing to thin
making me scream
make me redeemed
oh lord our god!
take me away
away from this
I dont want to be in this abyss

Chorus:
Its time!
its sign is showing so bright
its time!
to leave the sorrow behind
its time!
not to be blind
It’s time!
to start to rewind
It’s Time!

the scars on my wrist
turn into a mist
not clenching a fist
I accept all of this
heal me and fix me
detain my soul
im falling deep into this hole
taking its tole
I give you my heart
its now in your hands
for you to keep
its getting to deep

I make a promise ill never forget
ill serve you today and forever with this
You are my God
you’ll see me through this fog
and what ever happens
you’ll forever be my captain
my captain you’ll be
together forever is what I need

Chorus:
Its time!
its sign is showing so bright
its time!
to leave the sorrow behind
its time!
not to be blind
It’s time!
to start to rewind
It’s time!!!
It’s time!!!
It’s time…. (Whisper)

Its time to cross the line
you might think your fine
its time to fallow
to get out of the gallows
to untie your rope
he is your only hope
trust in the leader
he wont make you teeter

Its time!
its sign is showing so bright
its time!
to leave the sorrow behind
its time!
not to be blind
It’s time!
to start to rewind
It’s time…

So for some weird reason I’m deciding to post this. I need to get it off of my chest once and for all and never talk about it again. I only have told the closest people to me and some coworkers trying to find a solution about it. Its something that’s been bothering me and I feel if I dont just fully get this thing out Im going to do something I could regret. So I was scared getting my first job, most people kind of are. Especially awkward shy ones like myself. I never had this problem back where I came from, it all started here in this tiny nowhere town. I have had several older people (30-40) give me attention that is not a good kind. Im really shy so this stuff bothers me more than most. Most people shrug it off or cuss them out but I cant seem to do that. I mostly just skip over my words when this happens and try to run or ignore them. But I cant seem to do this with this one guy. The thurday idiot it what I call him. This man comes in every Thursday so it seems. How it started was he one day came up to me and put a high chair away for me. I didint want him to, its my job as the lobby person. He then asked me if I wanted to go out. I just shackly said “I-m I’m really busy ” I didnt know what else to say, being innocent minded I thought maybe this guy meant hang out or something which was still strange.  I should have told my mind that he was meaning to “Go out” with him as in a relationship.” He was quite for a while, several months. Until one day he came up to me and said. ” I saw your cross necklace. Im a christian too. Ive been watching you and you would make my perfect wife. I want to marry you.” I was shaking so bad I felt like I was going to faint. I just made up another off the fly dumb reply saying “Im to young for something like that” Gosh I should have got in his face then. He was quite for almost 5 months after that and just keeps staring at me. He erked me off for the past month only wearing Christians shirts like “WWJD and Forgiven.” I kept thinking why, why is he doing this in your name, God. What must be going on in this mans head to act like this. I talked to one of my coworkers and she said he has said dirty things to her and I ended up asking another employee and he had done the same to her. I also talked to a manger and she said she would take care of it. I did more investigated and couldnt find him on a sex offenders list. I ended up finding his car in the parking lot and his plates were from Oklahoma not from here. When people start stalking me I stalk back. I looked on his receipts for several months waiting for him to finally give his name and he finally did. I took down his license plate and only got his first name. I ask myself why do I even do this but I cant find an answer. Im trying to protect myself in a quite way I guess. I thought that he was only doing this to me but he was playing these games with others. But he was so much dirtier with them in his wording. He might have read me enough to know if he said those things to me; I might have done bodily harm to the man. Today he said “Here you can have this” He was holding out some money. I gave him the dirty look I could and said “No I am not going to take that.” I had enough courage today to look him in the eye and tell him. Part of me wants to talk to him to understand this person and there is this other part of me that wants to tear him apart and get all the anger out that he has caused. He has caused my brain to whirl and not understand. Today I almost cracked.. all I knew how to do was to hide and cry a bit. I dont understand why this is happening all I know is I hope it makes me a stronger person and to deal with people with more wit. Im done talking about this and I hope it never happens again. >:/